Finding Friends With Benefits in Norfolk County: The Unfiltered Guide to Casual Connections

I’m a writer, editor, and writing teacher. My work has appeared in The New York Times, Glamour, VICE, Vulture, The Cut, and much more. I cover a range of topics, but I’m especially passionate about celebrity culture, movies/TV, relationships, career, and mental health. I’ve published widely-read personal essays, reviews, reported features, trendpieces, and more, and I’m always game to try something new. I teach writing classes for Gotham Writers Workshop and Redbud Writing Project, and I’m also available for both 1:1 consulting and college essay editing, as well. I’ve also spoken about non-fiction writing and my career journey to college and grad school classes at NYU, Emerson College, and more. Speaking of which… I graduated from Emerson, where I studied Writing, Literature, and Publishing. Originally from New York, I now live in Raleigh, North Carolina with my husband, our dog, and her (very temperamental) cat older sister. You can check out some of my writing below: Who they are. RachelsDating is a pen name and working identity used by a small collective of writers, clinicians, and coach-practitioners who publish accessible, practice-oriented texts on dating psychology, sexual well-being, and pragmatic partner-finding strategies. The collective is composed of licensed clinicians, sex-positive educators and experienced dating coaches who contribute under the single umbrella name in order to present a unified, reader-facing voice while preserving the variety of clinical and lived experience behind each piece. The group purposely uses a shared pseudonym to make their output easier to find and to emphasize approach over authorial celebrity: readers see a consistent editorial tone and set of core values (consent, evidence-informed practice, harm reduction, and sexual agency) while each article, toolkit or guide is produced by one or more named contributors working behind the collective name. How they work RachelsDating operates as a collaborative editorial project. Contributors draft articles or toolkits individually, then submit them to an internal editorial review where clinicians and peers comment on clinical accuracy, inclusivity, and clarity. Pieces that touch on clinical intervention or therapeutic techniques are reviewed by at least one licensed clinician on the team. The collective also runs periodic round-table editorial meetings to align messaging, review reader feedback, and design multi-part series that move from foundational psychology to concrete, actionable skills for dating and intimacy. Publication takes several forms: long-form essays on relationship dynamics and sexual health, short evidence-summaries with practice tips, downloadable exercises (communication scripts, consent checklists, approach templates), and occasional interviews or case-based reflections. When content could influence clinical care (for example, exercises for sexual dysfunction or trauma-informed guidance), RachelsDating points readers toward licensed professionals and established referral directories. Topics they cover The collective’s published topics sit at the intersection of clinical psychology, sexology and pragmatic dating strategy. Typical themes include: Attachment, dating behaviour, and how early relational patterns influence partner choice. Sexual communication: scripts for asking about preferences, establishing boundaries, and negotiating consent. Sexual health literacy and common sexual function concerns framed in a sex-positive way. Online and app dating strategies that blend psychological insight with safety planning and realistic goal-setting. Special-interest guidance for kink-aware, ethically non-monogamous, LGBTQ+ and neurodivergent daters. Practical resources: worksheets, suggested reading, and signposts to professional help when issues are clinical in scope. Approach and expertise RachelsDating positions itself as evidence-informed and clinically respectful rather than prescriptive. Their approach combines: Clinical grounding: contributors with training in psychology, sex therapy and counselling vet clinical claims and provide references when recommending therapeutic practices. Sex-positive ethics: content normalizes consensual diversity in sexual expression while foregrounding safety, consent and harm reduction. Practical translation: research and therapeutic techniques are translated into short, usable exercises and scripts readers can try in real dating situations. Referral humility: when questions are outside the scope of self-help (trauma, persistent sexual pain, suicidal ideation), the collective routinely directs readers to licensed providers and professional directories. To stay current the collective reads peer-reviewed literature where available, follows professional standards in clinical sexology, and consults recognized directories and professional organizations when recommending clinicians or courses of action. Practical offerings readers can expect Readers will typically find a rotating blend of formats: short evidence summaries, "how-to" guides for first dates and consent conversations, downloadable communication scripts, and longer investigative essays that synthesize research on attraction, arousal and long-term relationship maintenance. The collective also publishes annotated reading lists and a small, curated referral list linking to directory services and certifying bodies for clinicians who need specialized care. Where to learn more (selected resources) RachelsDating aims to connect readers to reputable background reading and professional directories. The group often refers readers to well-established resources and clinicians who publish on dating and sex from clinical perspectives — for example, contributors and experts who write on platforms such as Psychology Today, evidence-informed practitioner blogs and directories such as the GoodTherapy author pages, and therapist-search listings like those on Pink Therapy’s directory. For kink-aware and ethically non-monogamy-friendly referrals the collective points readers to recognized Kink Aware Professionals directories such as the KAP directory. Editorial standards and reader safety Standards are simple and reader-first: cite sources where claims rely on research, avoid definitive claims where evidence is mixed, and flag when a topic requires individualized clinical care. The collective’s public content is explicitly not a substitute for therapy; it is intended to inform, destigmatize, and equip readers with conversational tools. When readers report red flags (abuse, coercion, self-harm risk), the editorial team responds by updating guidance, adding safety language and linking to crisis or specialist services. RachelsDating’s mission is pragmatic: to reduce shame, improve communication, and help people pursue intimate life with curiosity, consent and care. Their collective name signals a bridge between clinical thought and everyday practice — a place where readers can learn not just what research shows, but how to say the things that make relationships and sex better, safer, and more fulfilling. Selected professional resources cited in RachelsDating pieces: Psychology Today — Rachel Allyn, Ph.D. (contributor page) GoodTherapy — Rachel Keller (author/therapist pieces) Pink Therapy — therapist directory (example listings) KAP — Kink & Poly Aware Professionals directory